That’s it then! I have permission, yes, ‘reading is fuel’ so I can read lots and lots and lots. I have always been an avid reader. From Mr Pinkwhistle’s Party (Enid Blyton) all the way through to Labyrinth (Kate Mosse) which I have just finished for the second time. I always have multiple books on the go. I am also reading a book about the Earl of Carnarvon and his quests in Egypt, Mrs Harris goes to Paris and the latest Robert Galbraith doorstop. In addition, there is always a magazine knocking around and then there is t’intetnet if I happen to be without a physical book.
Yes, I counter balance my ‘normalness’ by disappearing into stories and learning about other people’s lives. And now, at long last, I find that it is fine to do this as it is fuel for my own writing. Let me explain where I discovered this revelation. I was listening to Dr Chatterjee’s podcast ‘Feel Better, Live More’ https://drchatterjee.com/how-to-build-good-habits-and-break-bad-ones-with-james-clear-re-release/ and he was interviewing someone called James Clear. To be honest, I have no idea who this fella is but he has written a book (Atomic Habits) and was talking about developing good habits. He then dropped this bombshell:
“If I don’t have good ideas to write about, I don’t need to be writing more, I need to read more.”
In order to have good ideas we need to read more so that we can then write more – wow, wow, WOW! Reading is the fuel which drives my/ our creativity. I appreciate, especially as I live with someone who is dyslexic, that reading could also mean watching TV, listening to the radio and podcasts and/ or audible books but it confirmed that taking time to take information from others is important. I can read without guilt. At last.
I suppose that this revelation then made me examine why I have the guilt about reading. Why do I feel so furtive about picking up a book? Education has always been important in my family and I learned to read before I started school. It was one of the two things I have always found easy, the other one being swimming, for anyone who is interested. However, I realise as I look back, that although education was important it was education delivered in a particular way. Education was key because it would enable you to get a good job, for life. It would teach you how to be a good citizen, pay your taxes etc. I mean, my grandma was even a school governor.
But, and here it comes, it all went a bit wrong. I actually liked reading too much and it became my window to the outside world. Don’t get me wrong, no one stopped me reading, I was bought books, I was part of the monthly book club at school. We picked a book from a catalogue, paid for it and waited eagerly for them to arrive. It was, quite simply the best thing about my primary school years. I was taken to the local library for books, I was bought books at Christmas although curiously, less so for my birthday. I wonder if it is because it is in the summer and people don’t read in the summer do they? I even strove to win the PE Prize at school so that I could go on the trip with other winners to select my book which was the actual prize. I only ever did win it once though, because “you are already good at PE and don’t need the motivation.” I needed the books though! What were these people thinking.
The school were right in one regard, my degree and post graduate studies headed me into Sports Science and I qualified as a PE Teacher. I am not going to say I didn’t enjoy this area of study but to be honest, it was never my first choice of career. I did OK for quite a long while though before the body and COVID got in the way.
Things will out though, won’t they? Even if it takes a while. And here I am, using the reading fuel, starting to let my creativity out into the world. Next time I have a ‘discussion’ with my husband about ‘the books littering up the place’, I will just reply “Sorry, they are my fuel”. I now feel like for the first time that I can admit to my ‘addiction’ because, just like a green smoothie, books are good for me.
Oh – please don’t tell anyone else will you? I need to keep my ‘Normal Cape’ in place. If people know that reading is my ticket to an extraordinary world, maybe they will find ways to take it away and that would never do.DiaryEAD
Thx!